I Never Thought I’d Make It To 30

During my time as a 20 something, I had a profound sense that I would never make it to 30 years old. It was weird; almost like my ability to see my future past that point just stopped. It was a somewhat unnerving, yet serene experience – one I faced with a surreal kind of acceptance of fate. I have told very few people about this, but now I am telling you.

You see, due to my lack of ability to see any future past the age of 30, I just came to terms with the thought that something would happen to me between now and then which I couldn’t foresee, but that would change my life immeasurably – naturally, I just figured that would be death, and the end of my time here amongst the living.

That might seem seriously morbid and unnecessarily extreme to the reader, but it’s how I felt, right or wrong. It was a weird feeling, and not really a though that scared me, which I found particularly interesting.

Well, I am now 30 years old, and racing at full speed through my 31st year on planet Earth on a collision course with my 32nd – and life has never been better. I’m more alive today than I have ever been, and I have one thing to thank for it – my future vision, my mission, my legacy. I am no longer limited in what I see for my future – in fact, I now see a legacy that stretches until the end of time itself. That’s not ego or greed, it’s a vision for the World and the part I play in it that is bigger than me and my life, and that will live long beyond the point at which my body decays and rots back into the ground from which I was born.

Through my early years, and especially my teens and my 20’s, I was extremely naive and thoroughly ignorant. I stopped learning when I left school, and when I decided to drop out of college to work full time at Pizza Hut so I could focus on my career as a musician (or as I affectionately referred to it at the time, a ‘rock star’) I seemed to leave my curiosity for the World at the college gates.

I didn’t know what I didn’t know, and to be quite frank, I didn’t care. I didn’t think it was important, and I didn’t think it applied to me. I thought I knew what I needed to know, and so I fumbled through life for years, blinding hitting wall after wall of dissatisfaction and despair.

In my 20’s, I hated my job, and spent my days daydreaming about when I would become a ‘rock star’ and everything would be okay. Fulfilment was a pipe-dream, and satisfaction seemed to live on another planet, whilst I wallowed in the mud of disillusionment, accepting little to no responsibility for my lot in life, or the path I had chosen to walk.

Then, at 25, I started to wake up.

I have since come to realise that the reason I could see no future past 30 was partly that 30 was a subconsciously important landmark in my life (mainly as a result of extensive social conditioning around the importance of that milestone), and because I had no vision for my future.

You future visions is everything – it’s what makes you hungry, and that fuels the fire in your belly to get out there and smash through your goals. It’s what makes life worth living, and what drives us forward against all odds, and immense adversity. My future vision today would drive me through hell and back, and in a lot of ways it already has, testing my determination and resolve almost to breaking point on many occasions.

Still, my determination is unwavering, and my vision propels me forward, leaving a legacy in it’s wake that my children and generations to come can be proud to model.

Calcifying my vision, my reason for living – my ‘why” – was one of the single most important aspects of deep personal introspection I have undertaken. It sparked a flame at the end of what was an extremely dark tunnel, and lit the way to fulfilment of my desires and passions, and that showed me how I could take that passion, amplify it, and share it with the World in ways that cause tidal waves of positive change across the face of the planet.

My vision keeps me going when there’s nothing else left.

So here’s my message to you; find yourself. Calcify your vision, and set about delivering your legacy to the World. Know who you are, and how you can add value to the World around you – EVERYONE has value to add, and everyone has a message to share that can positively affect the hearts and minds of people the World over.

What’s your message? What’s your vision? What will your legacy look like and how will it impact the World when your meat cart has rotted and returned to the roots of the Earth?

Know this; the value you have is everything inside of you. Know yourself, and then take that knowledge of self out to the World to share the intrinsic value of compounded experience you hold within. Everything you need is inside yourself, and everything the World needs is inside each and every one of us.

I spent my life climbing the mountain with my eyes closed, my ears deaf and my mind numb, but when I started to wake up at 25, I removed my limitations one by one, and started to give myself to the World wholly and completely. This 5 year turning point period in my life marked the final road to the top of that mountain – to the peaks of clarity, providing a 360 degree vision I had never before experienced. Stood here on the peak I can see for miles in every direction, and it’s so clear to me now. I have the foresight to see each and every path available to me, along with the challenges and achievements that come with each path.

But it’s not time to descend the mountain; oh no. There is no going down from here, like most people will joke about turning 30 years old. I’ve spent my life climbing the mountain, and now it’s my time to spread my wings, take my leap of faith, and soar.

Today is the first day of your life, and you are a gift – whoever you are, wherever you are, please don’t waste it.

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Mind Your Own Business

Yeah – that’s right; I’m talkin’ to YOU!

But I’m not saying what you think I’m saying. Rather than chastising you for poking your nose into areas of other’s lives that don’t concern you, I’m talking about running your own business.

I am a firm believer in the concept of the modern ‘entrepreneur revolution’, as written about by author and entrepreneur Daniel Priestley. As our technology advances exponentially, we are finding that machines and computers are taking more and more of our traditional ‘jobs’ and thus decimating the jobs market. This is inevitably leading to a World where people are having to become increasingly reliant on adding value to others through creative, esoteric and essentially human pursuits. Thanks to ‘Moore’s Law’, this trend shows no signs of abating any time soon – or, ever.

So, it’s time to adapt.

When I come across people who fight against change, too comfortable in what they know, and as a result slowing dying as their mental fortitude atrophies in the stark lack of adversity, I try to explain to them that change is the only thing that’s guaranteed in life and as such it is both senseless and futile to fight against it. Yet, so many do. So many are too comfortable in what they know, and have never been shown the intrinsic value in the realisation that life happens for us, rather than too us.

Anyone with their eyes open and head out of the sand can see that we are in a massive time of flux. Think about this; up until around 50-100 years ago, the rate of change in the World was relatively slow. It was unlikely that any one person would see any dramatic, global change in a single lifetime, and so our ancestors natural habitat was one of relative consistency (another point to consider is that people didn’t live as long back then, so were even less likely to experience any dramatic levels of socioeconomic change). That is no longer so. We have reached a pivotal point in the bellcurve of our technological advancement as a race, and as such we are now experiencing massive levels of change, not just within a single human lifetime, but within the space of a few years.

This effect – the quickening of the rate of socioeconomic change in the World – is compounding, and therefore ever expanding and becoming more and more pervasive in our everyday lives.

All the more reason to accept the argument that one of the smartest things you can do in life is to accept, and embrace change – move in flow with it, and expand your skills, abilities and consciousness along with the ever expanding seas of change.

So, back on to managing your own business.

Now, although I’m a huge advocate of setting up and owning (owning, not operating – there’s a massive difference) your own business, what I’m talking about here is not strictly limited to owning your own company. I mean to mind the business of your life! You see, even if you are happiest and most fulfilled in employment and therefore have no desire to own your own business, you still need to run your own business.

That business is managing and investing your money to create passive income streams.

Even the lowest paid workers are able to do this; the trouble is that hardly anyone knows how. The reason? Our education system is severely lacking, and antiquated in it’s content and methods. Our current education system was designed back in the industrial age, and is set up perfectly for training an obedient population of worker bees to go out and work in offices and factories across the land. This is an old model that no longer fits, nor is fit for purpose; the landscape has already changed significantly, and yet our model for how we educate the next generation of leaders is distinctly lacking.

Remember the entrepreneur revolution? All those jobs being done more reliably, more efficiently and with less error by computers and machines. The ever expanding sea of change is upon us, and it’s imperative for us to act in order to not be swept away in the tide.

One simple argument for managing your own business, regardless of your situation, is that there will be no state pension when my children retire – nor when I retire for that matter. In order for my generation, and all those that follow, to be comfortable in retirement we need to learn to manage our money, and to start right now.

Young people today need to adopt an upgraded perception of the World in order to realise the successes the dream of; education starts now. There are so many holes in the national curriculum that you have your work cut out for you when you leave the traditional education system. In the last year and a half alone I have listened to 17 solid days of audio books, and not a single one of them fiction. That investment of time in my own education has changed my life irrevocably, and will continue to do so, compounding as I learn more and more, adding knowledge and action onto knowledge and action; and so success is born.

If you don’t learn to look after yourself, no one else is going to do it for you, and odds are you’re going to allow yourself to get fucked by the system. Whether you like it or not, this life is a game – and you’re fucking playing it until you die. Now, you have two choices (and you always have a choice) – are you going to learn the rules of the game and play it to the best of your ability, embracing opportunity and opening doors for yourself along the way? Or are you going to fight it, kicking and screaming as it bends you over and degrades you into submission and misery?

I know which is my choice; I’d rather die fighting, having played all out despite the odds, than to arrive at my grave a slave to a life I surrendered myself to decades ago because I was too afraid or ignorant to take a chance on myself.

It’s your life, and your responsibility.

Make it count – learn the rules, and play the game.

Trading: The Basics

Trading the financial markets is, in my opinion, one of the best of several ways to turn the tables of wealth in your favour. That said, the scary fact is that 90% of retail traders lose money and fail at trading the markets. Why is this? Put simply, it’s because they are not trading – they’re gambling. Most people who jump into the markets have no idea what they’re doing, don’t bother to do any research or learn the skills required to be profitable consistently, and then wonder why they lose money hand over fist.

I know this, because that’s exactly the mistake I made when I first started trading.

I learned about what seemed to be a simple strategy using GUPPY Multiple Moving Averages crossing each other in a specific way and jumped straight into the markets with no idea what support and resistance even meant, and no concept of risk management. This was a big mistake, and although I closed many profitable trades using this method, my loses far exceeded my profits, and it wasn’t long before I had wiped out my account equity through risky emotional trading.

As I had no concept of risk management strategies, I used a ridiculous amount of leverage trading CFD’s and I engaged in dangerous ‘revenge’ trading after losing half of my account equity on a position that turned against me. This wouldn’t have been so bad if I had been using a strict trading plan to remove the emotion, but as it was I ended up moving my stop loss further and further away from my entry in the desperate hope the position would turn around and move back in my favour. I kept moving my stop loss until I was risking several times the value of the position, and it eventually took me out with over a 120% loss. To make matters even worse, the market then turned around and began moving back in my favour – you can imagine my complete and utter devastation.

This led to a bout of emotional revenge trading which saw me wipe out the rest of my account value, to the point where I didn’t even have enough left to open a new position.

I was beside myself, and it was one of the hardest things I’ve had to endure emotionally.

A lot of people make exactly the same mistake, and a lot of them make these mistakes using money borrowed from credit cards, friends or family – money that isn’t theirs, and which they certainly can’t afford to lose.

So, although I love trading, and have now come out the other side after immersing myself in learning and practice, I am acutely aware of the dangers and risks involved and it is for this reason that I want to help others avoid the same mistakes I made so they can get to a position of being consistently profitable much more quickly than I did, and with less heartache.

Trading – The Basics

Risk Management

Risk management is THE most important part of any trading plan; without it, it is extremely unlikely you will ever be consistently profitable. If you go on-line you’ll find tonnes of information about trading with people showing you 1000% gains per trade and other completely unrealistic nonsense. Be very careful what you believe and buy into when viewing material on-line, and if you see anyone pushing trading systems or indicators that purport to realise massive quick gains then avoid them at all costs.

Trading is NOT a get rich quick scheme – it takes time, practice and discipline to master, and the amount you are able to make/lose per trade is directly proportional to the value of your account equity.

You should always know exactly what price you are looking to enter a trade, and exactly what price level you are getting out of a trade – whether that’s being stopped out by your pre-determined stop loss because your prediction was wrong and the market moved against you, or being taken out at a pre-determined ‘take profit’ level.

There are three basic rules I work to when managing my risk in trading:

  1. Never risk more than 1% of your account equity per trade
  2. Always use a stop loss, and never move it once in the trade unless doing so is part of your pre-determined trading plan (for example, letting profits run and using a trailing stop loss behind significant candles or price structure)
  3. Do not enter a trade unless you have good reason to believe you can achieve at least a 1:1 risk/reward ratio on lower timeframe trades (5 minute charts), or a 1:3 risk/reward ratio on swing day trades on the higher timeframes (1 hour, 4 hour, and daily charts)

Analysis

Analysing the markets is so important before jumping into any positions – if you haven’t analysed the markets intelligently before opening a position, then your gambling and risking losing a serious amount of money based on a whim. There are two type of analysis when it comes to financial markets – technical analysis, and fundamental analysis.

Technical Analysis is the analysis is price action on the charts. It’s look at support and resistance zones created by historical price data, and the information conveyed through each individual candle stick. There are many technical analysis indicators out there, and certainly too many to go through here, but I would recommend ignoring most of them until you’ve mastered the basics and are working profitably consistently.

The technical indictors I use on a regular basis are as follows:

  1. Moving Averages – these are basically dynamic support and resistance zones that are based on information derived from a set period of historical price data. I use the 20, 50 and 200 period simple moving average, and the 8 period exponential moving average (I use different combinations of these depending on what strategy I’m using, but the 200SMA is one a use consistently across all markets as it’s one of the key indicators used by the large financial institutions)
  2. RSI – this is the relative strength index and put simply indicates buying or selling strength in a given market. Some people use this to trade trending channels, but I only use this as a rough reference and it doesn’t form a key part of my strategy – it’s more of an added confluence that would help confirm justification of a position along with other more potent reasons
  3. ATR – this is the Average True Range and is again based on a pre-defined period of historical price action. The ATR gives an indication of the level of volatility in a given market, and I use this to determine appropriate prices levels for my positions stop loses by keeping them wide of normal market volatility levels which can vary throughout the day
  4. Support & Resistance – this is probably the primary indicator I use when it comes to technical analysis, and are basically important prices levels determined by and derived from historical price data. They are basically levels where a given market has consistently struggled to break through, and so offer some indication of good levels to get in and out of trades. If I’m in a trade and it’s approaching a key daily or weekly support/resistance level, then I’ll be tightening my stops and closely managing the trade as there’s an increase probability of it turning around and moving against me when price action reaches these levels. Support and resistance is a great way to determine management levels for your trades and should never be ignored. Support is a price level where price action moves down to and then bounces upwards from, and resistance is a price level where price action moves up to and then bounces back down from
  5. Candle Sticks – candles tell us a lot about the sentiment in a given market by showing rejection from certain price levels and the shape of a fully formed candle can often be used a entry or exit signals for trades. There are many different names for different types of candle and candle stick formations, but the key ones I use on a consistent basis are the Pin Bar and Engulfing Candle

Fundamental analysis is a little more complex, and a little more involved if you’ve not done it before, and basically involves digging into the fundamental information about a stock or commodity to ascertain if there is a strong possibility of that stock going up or down in price. This often involves staying on top of financial and business news, and reading company reports and financial data. This is important and should not be ignored.

Most people will tend to favour one method of analysis over another, and that’s fine, but I would certainly recommend learning both as different strategies will require different skill sets and information sets. For example, when buying physical stock shares in companies my predominant method of analysis is through looking at fundamentals, but when day trading through CFD’s or Spread Bets I tend to favour technical analysis.

If I’m investing in company stock long term, then I want to be sure the company has strong financial data, low levels of debt in relation to it’s revenue, and healthy rising profits.

Your Trading Plan

Finally, it is of paramount importance that you have a written trading plan that you have back tested on the markets you wish to trade. Having a written plan helps to take the emotions out of trading, and gives you a strict set of rules to work to when opening, managing or closing positions in the markets.

A trading plan is just a set of rules that you stick to every time you enter into a trade, and that is based on the results of your back testing analysis through historical data. Always backtest your strategies using historical price data so you can form a meaningful and consistently profitable set of rules to work to when trading. I have several strategies that I’ve learned and devised that I’ve back tested over years of price data, and this is what gives me the confidence that overall my strategies are profitable. This is so important, as there will always be losing trades, and that’s fine so long as your using good risk management to cut your loses early and run your profits, and if you have faith in your plan being profitable over the long term because you’ve tested it on historical data.

Back testing might seem arduous and a lot of work, and although it can be a time consuming process, it’s well worth the time investment to ensure you’re operating a trading plan that is consistently profitable over a long period of time (years).

A trading plan is essential for removing the emotion from your trading – if you let your emotions tag along for the ride you WILL lose money. A good plan makes all your trading decisions for you, so you can’t get caught up in emotional trading when price action moves against you. Devise a good plan, and have the discipline to stick to it and you will be profitable over the long term.

Getting to grips with the basics I’ve outlined here will put you in a much stronger position than 90% of people who trade the financial markets, and although it takes time to learn and practice before refining your ability and techniques, mastering these basic concepts will start you on the path to consistently profitable trading.

If you’re interested in learning more, or in some private tuition on the basics of trading and understanding the markets, then get in touch with me at littlegreyjk@gmail.com for more information.

 

Pain or Pleasure?

There are two prime movers in life that provide motivation to change where we are, and improve our position towards avoiding one, and moving towards the other; enter pain and pleasure. But, which is the more powerful motivating force in our lives?

“The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you’re in control of your life. If you don’t, life controls you.”

– Tony Robbins

Ultimately, it comes down to these two things, and these two things alone. What are the sources of pain in our lives? These are the things we are motivated to move away from. Anything that causes us pain, will be a motivator for some sort of change in our lives as the only way to move away from a present source of pain is for it to be not so present anymore. If we change who are, who we associate with and how we behave then are able to facilitate changes in ourselves, and thus our lives, which reduces the amount of pain we feel.

Equally as important and motivating (especially for the male species it seems) is the desire to move towards experiences and behaviours that give us pleasure. Any experience that increases happiness, fulfilment or love in life is going to act as a powerful force pulling us towards more of the same. Who doesn’t want more pleasure in their lives, right?

But here’s the thing; are the two really equal in their power over us? Surprisingly, no.

“People will do more to avoid pain than they will do to gain pleasure”

– Tony Robbins

It seems pain is a much more powerful agent for change than gaining pleasure – something Tony has noticed after working with millions of people over the course of his career in coaching people to ultimate personal success. Increase someone’s level of pain they feel around something they’re not happy with in their life and they’re considerably more likely to make the changes necessary, and more importantly to embed those changes as a new way of live, than they are if they were to attempt to motivate themselves with the promise of pleasure as a reward for changing.

There are a few reasons for this, and it makes sense when you think about it. Firstly, if you’re in a position where you are feeling deep pain it’s like being in an oven turned up to maximum heat. You will do anything to stop the pain because it’s very real in the here and now. The alternative you’re trying to move towards might not even be pleasure, but just a more benign state that is more bearable than the searing heat of your current situation. In a state of pain, the here and now is far from comfortable, and this is a huge motivating factor.

Conversely, if the level of pain is more bearable, and you are attempting to motivate change by focusing on the pleasure of achievement, of reaching your goals, then your here and now is a lot more comfortable. Sure, it would be great to lose that weight, or to get a better job that you enjoy more, but that seems like a lot of work compared with the relative comfort of your present position. When the current level of pain is tepid, the motivation to get off your arse and do what needs to be done can wane quickly, like water through a sieve. Comfort is a dangerous animal, and we should all take great care to not spend too much time there – when we’re comfortable, we aren’t capable of achieving our greatest potential for personal and professional growth.

“In this World you’re either growing or you’re dying, so get in motion and grow”

– Lou Holtz

In the words of T. Harv Eker; you have to grow you comfort zone to grow your money zone. This is true in all walks of life; you don’t grow a muscle without first stressing it through exercise, and pushing it to the limits of it’s capability. You don’t improve your VO2 Max or marathon time without stressing your cardiovascular system and pushing it to it’s limits on a regular basis. Stress is the prime mover for growth, whether it’s physical stress to strengthen the body, or psychological stress to strengthen the fortitude of the mind. Just take a look around you, look deeply at the World and you will see this law of nature all around you as you start to notice the mechanics of life.

This is why so many people talk about wanting to change – and they really do want to change – but never actually do. It’s because they’re too comfortable where they are, and although they aren’t happy with their situation, they aren’t in enough pain to get the motivation required to take action and make the changes they need in their lives. A typical example is someone who complains constantly about their work life; they hate their job, their boss is an arsehole and the office politics are unbearable. Yet, those same people are still in the same situation after years of suffering because they are too comfortable. They might hate their jobs, but they make excuses like; I have a family to feed, I have a mortgage, I have obligations and commitments, and that’s why I am stuck where I am.

Bullshit. You’re stuck where you are because ever day you wake up and make a conscious choice to stay in a life you despise. Take some responsibility, own your life and your decisions, because no one is holding a gun to your head. You and you alone are the sole person who has made all the choices in your life, and if you haven’t then you have let others make your choices for you – which is still you making a choice to abdicate from making your own choices.

I’ve been that person, so I speak from first hand experience.

So, if you are not happy with some aspect of your life you need to make the experience more painful. Take that pain dial and turn it up to 11! Trying to coax yourself to change by dangling the carrot of pleasure is unlikely to have the motivational power required to make the significant changes in life that can really move the needle in your level of happiness and fulfilment. Instead, step into the pain of where you are and amplify it. A great exercise you can practice to do this is to meditate on the things that you’re not happy with in your life, and imagine traveling through time into your future – 5 years, then 10 years, then 20 years…. and see yourself and your life as it will be if you don’t make the changes you need to make in your life. What have you lost? What opportunities did you miss? What does it feel like to deal with that level of pain and despondency for all those years? How bitter have you become as a result of your resentment and low self-esteem? As you move years into your hypothetical future amplifying those feels and seeing all the negative effects not changing has had on you, your loved ones and your life as a whole, a determination builds up in you like no other. When the pain is so great from being fully aware and present in how your lack of action will manifest in your life years from now, you will also find an overwhelming motivation to get in motion and start doing things differently. From that state, go back to the present and commit fully to making the changes you need to make in your life – the pain from your current path now being so great that staying there is unbearable, and moving away from it is a must. See how those changes play out in your life, and feel all the rewards, happiness and fulfilment they will bring you over the coming weeks, months and years. The more present you can be throughout this exercise, the more potent the experience will be.

This is such a powerful method for combining the power of both pain and pleasure as agents for change. It’s an experience I have personally been through, and I can tell you it was a like a roundhouse kick to the face in waking me up and getting me making the changes I needed to make in my life.

Amazing things happen when you stand up and take ownership of your choices in life – doors open that you never knew existed and everything starts to come together. Is it easy? Fuck no. Remember what this blog is about? You NEED discomfort to grow! You need pain because it is a powerful prime mover. We are all going to feel both pleasure and pain in our lives no matter what decisions we make, because we can’t get it right all the time. That being the case, we need to learn how to make the pain and pleasure we experience work to serve us and build our character.

Pain and pleasure are both wonderful teachers, and they each teach very different subjects. The lessons taught by painful experiences cannot be taught by pleasurable experiences, and vice versa. We need both to grow, and to live in harmony and balance. That can be a hard thing to accept, especially with some of the decadence and brutality we see in the World, but in accepting this we allow ourselves to take back control of our lives and our destiny.

Life doesn’t happen to you, life happens for you.

It’s MY Life

This blog is for all my fellow MMI graduates, and anyone interested in what the Millionaire Mind Intensive is all about – it was an amazing event, and if you haven’t been, you should!

 

On Sunday afternoon we were re-introduced to this song by Bon Jovi in a way I’ll never forget, and this song now holds so much potency for me that it will serve as a powerful reminder of the lessons we learned that day for the rest of my life.

 

I’ve always liked this song, however following the amazing weekend we had in London this song has become a powerful and emotive anchor for me – I will remember that Sunday afternoon vividly to the day I die; it will be my source of strength, and a potent voice reminding me that I CREATE MY LIFE. Here’s why…

 

After two and a half long days of unlearning the bullshit conditioning that prevailed in one form or another for most of the people at the event, and subsequently re-learning and re-conditioning my mind and body at a cellular level with an approach of congruent empowerment and spiritual enlightenment (yes, that’s right – money, wealth and spirituality go hand in hand), what we experienced that Sunday afternoon changed the way I view myself and my world forever.

 

That afternoon, as Marcus stood on stage and began explaining what we were about to do, my emotions (and, I imagine, those of everyone in the room) were running high. The energy was immense, but even that was about to be blown through the roof.

 

As the disclaimer forms were handed out for us all to sign, Marcus explained that we were all about to be provided with the ultimate opportunity to break through our bullshit limiting beliefs… we were to break a hunting arrow, with the point resting on the soft parts of our necks just above the sternum and the opposite end firmly supported against a partners hand. That’s right, we were to snap an arrow with our necks. The game was on.

 

As we patiently listened to his explanation of what was to follow I could feel the tension in the room rising. Were we really about to do this? What if it didn’t work? What if it pierced our necks, impaling ourselves on our arrows – a tool used to realise the state of death as it’s primary intended purpose? I can only speak for myself, but I’m sure my fellow graduates will agree, the mind chatter was almost intolerable. Fear was taking hold and ripping us away from ourselves, toying with us, doing everything is could – saying everything imaginable – to scare us into submission and to keep us firmly stuck where we were; knee deep in our own shit.

 

How you anything is how you do everything.

 

This was the ultimate test – and I thought walking on a bed of hot coals at UPW at the end of April was going to be a challenge!

 

So, the room of over 1000 people signed the forms and split into groups of 10, and each designated a leader for the group – I was the leader of mine. I gathered the forms to hand back to the trainers, and as I handed over our forms, I was handed back 10 arrows, a heavy duty safety glove and protective glasses for each member of my group. Shit was getting real.

 

Were we really going to do this?

 

As I handed out the arrows to each member of my group, none of us could resist the temptation of testing the point to try and get a feel for what we were about to do. Now, the point wasn’t to a fine to point, but even slightly rounded it felt very uncomfortable even testing it on the area of my neck which was to be the primary pressure point for the break. Again, the volume of the mind chatter was rising – what the fuck am I doing? What if..? What if? What if? A lot of what if’s were going through my mind – my conscious self was trying to take me out of the game, and it was a constant battle between the fear in my mind, and the courage in my heart. I knew I needed to do this, but even then I had no idea how powerful the experience was going to be.

 

You see, the minds primary role is for protection against change, derived from millennia of evolution to that end. It’s always done a fairly good job of stopping us from being eaten by large wild predators, however these days that same mechanism is mostly responsible for our ability to create our own limiting beliefs which take us out of the game of life as we squash any opportunity that comes our way which puts us outside our nice little comfort zone. The problem is, you can only grow so much in that comfortable little zone, and the people in life who achieve great things – whether that be great wealth, great feats of nature and great success – make it their life’s mission to put themselves outside their comfort zone at every opportunity.

 

As we learned over the course of the weekend, as you grow your comfort zone, you grow your money/income zone.
“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” – Neale Donald Walsch 
I have found this to be true in other aspects of my life over recent years, particularly in regards to my Tae Kwon Do career, but what we were about to experience was about to calcify the truth in this statement in a way that left a lasting impression on all of us.

 

In that moment, as we stood there in our groups with our arrows and equipment, we had to make a choice – were we prepared to break through out bullshit limiting beliefs once and for all? Were we prepared to do whatever it takes? For me, the answer was a nervous, yet resounding, YES!

 

Before we could commence the exercise we had one job left to do; pick our most potent limiting belief and write it on our arrows to symbolise breaking through those beliefs as we broke through our fears and through our arrows.

 

As the martial artist in the group, and being the leader, I put on the protective glove and sat into my stance to brace the arrows for my partners. One by one they conquered their fears, showed unwavering courage, and smashed through themselves. Each and every one of us stepped up the stage, placed the point of the arrow on our necks as we had been directed, and pushed ourselves into the point.

 

We all snapped our arrows; the resulting rush of emotions and biochemicals was exhilarating, liberating and empowering as they coursed through our minds and bodies.

 

We celebrated like crazy after each person snapped their arrows, with high fives all round in recognition of each persons fortitude towards breaking through their fears and limiting beliefs. After everyone was done, the music came on full volume and the room exploded! They played Bon Jovi’s ‘It’s My Life’ and although I’ve heard that song a hundred times before, it played with so much more power and meaning that day and became a powerful anchor for the experience we had just shared together.

 

Let me tell you, being part of a group of a thousand people all operating at that level of empowerment and exhilaration was an amazing environment to be a part of, and a feeling I will never forget as long as I live.

 

What did it teach me? It taught me that fear kills dreams, and also that all we have to do to get where we want to be in life is to recognise that internal self-talk for what it is, say ‘thank you for sharing’ as we push it to one side, and move forward anyway. It taught me that dipping my toe in the waters on my dreams is painful, the same way pushing our necks against those arrows slowly and cautiously was so much more painful than pushing into it with force and congruent determination. If you’re going to do something in life, then fucking do it – don’t dip your toe in the waters of your dreams, jump the fuck in and go for a swim. Immerse yourself in your dreams, and immerse yourself in the attainment of them. Push straight into the arrows in your life – your dreams and goals – and do so with power, purpose and passion.

 

It reminded me that I can do whatever I decide I want to do, it reminded me that the only person responsible for creating my life is me. I make my own opportunities, I decide who I am going to be, and I decide what level I play at when working towards my dreams and goals. I am the sole person responsible where I am right now, and I am the only one who can change that – all it takes is making a choice to step outside that comfort zone, say thank you for sharing to my mind and its attempts to protect me from success by keeping me in my comfort zone, and to do the work that speaks to my heart by playing all out, full on, at 110%.

 

It was also a powerful reminder of how important it is to have a good team around you, whether in life or in business. Having my strong team around me providing their unwavering support and cheering me on only served to add to my resolve and helped to calcify my belief in my ability to succeed. The power of having a good team around you cannot be understated in anything you do, and this powerful lesson was a healthy reminder of that fact. We shared our apprehensions and fears, and we shared our success – supporting my fellow team mates as they broke their arrows, and celebrating with them was almost as powerful and rewarding as completing the exercise myself – another important lesson; the fruits of success aren’t just derived from our own achievements, but also from serving others and being a part of their success. After all, what’s the point of developing ourselves if we don’t then use our new found power, skills and abilities to help others do the same, to help others rise to their challenges, overcome them and win the day. Your own personal success is only part of the equation, the other part is the role we play in the success of others.

 

This experience changed my life; it taught me so much about who I am, and who I have the potential to be. It taught me that I am responsible, and I have the power to create whatever life I want – all I have to do is recognise, understand and push through my fears and limiting beliefs, to step outside of my familiar zone of comfort, and do whatever it takes, within moral and legal boundaries, to create the opportunities in my life that will deliver me to the success I dream of.

 

And do you know what’s particularly exciting about this? Everyone can do it, all it takes is a choice.

 

Check out the song below, and have an amazing day:

 

 

Edit: Here’s a photo of the remains of the arrow I talk about in this blog – I’ve stuck it atop my computer at work to serve as a perpetual reminder of the experience and what I learned. I said I would post a photo in the comments, but am not able to do so which is why I’m posting it here at the end of the article.

Jamie Keeling Little Grey JK Arrow Break

Remnants of my arrow from the arrow break exercise – MMI 31/03/17 to 02/04/17